The Smith's est. 2013: The Big "L" Word

The first couple weeks of dating were...interesting. Still uneasy about the whole relationship thing, Ryan was super awkward. I've always been a huge fan of PDA, so naturally, I would grab his hand or try (keyword: "try") to kiss him goodbye, but he would find any excuse to dodge my acts of affection. After grabbing his hand, it would be a, "Oh, look over there!" while releasing his hand from mine and using it to point at some random building or object, or a casual, "I've got to get something out of my backpack". While leaning in for a quick kiss, he was like a chicken pecking the ground, barely touching my lips and being as quick as possible. I would ask him if he wanted to do something and he would say, "Well, I think the guys are doing something tonight so let me see what they're doing first and then, we'll see." The best was when we were out to lunch with his best friend, Gary and his mom. Our waitress was a girl he knew, so he introduced his mom, turned to me and said, "And this is my (slight pause) ffffrrriend, Teisha". Say what? Did he just call me his friend?
Surprisingly, all of this didn't really bug me as much as it normally would have. I had a lot of patience with him which was another shocker. Let's just say, I'm not the most patient person in the world. Normally, I would've gotten frustrated, asked him what his problem was, and probably eventually would've given up and moved on, but Ryan was different and a part of me knew that.
Ryan's behavior went on for about a month or so and just around the corner was Valentine's Day. Of course, I couldn't use the "L" word. We had only been seriously dating for about a month and a half and I didn't want to rush anything or scare him off. Plus, saying "I love you" is a serious thing. Was I really in love with Ryan? This may sound weird and at the time, I didn't really believe it myself, but I can honestly say that I was. Even after all of Ryan's awkwardness, I still knew things were going to work out and be okay. I can't really explain it, but you know how when people use the phrase "I just knew" or "It was meant to be"? Well, I did know that Ryan and I were going to be together for a very long time and yes, Ryan and I were meant to be. Call me crazy, but that Valentine's Day, I knew I was in love with Ryan. Was I going to tell him though? With the way he was acting, of course not.
I had never been a huge fan of Valentine's Day. I always tend to go all out for holidays. I love to celebrate whenever I can and because of that, I think I held my expectations way too high for all of my past boyfriends, so I was always let down and never impressed. I didn't necessarily expect a lot from Ryan since he had been acting so off, but I was determined to make it a good one no matter what. I decorated his car with tons of hearts that said different things, tied balloons to his side view mirrors, and made him one of those big candy cards. I was pretty proud of myself, but Ryan definitely out-did me! I had to work a graveyard the night before Valentine's Day. At 6:30 a.m., I walked out to my car to find a single rose laying on my windshield. Picking the rose up, I noticed that it was still warm despite the frost covering my windows. Ryan must have just been there and sure enough as I turned around to look, there went his car turning down the street to head home. While driving home, I couldn't help thinking about how sweet his rose act was. Roses are my favorite flowers. I loved it and couldn't wait to see him after I had gotten a couple hours of sleep. As I turned onto my street, I saw someone standing in my driveway. "Who in the world?"...My lights shined on a good looking man holding a bouquet of flowers all spiffed up in a suit and a handsome hair do to top it off. My face lit on fire and a big smile spread across my cheeks as Ryan came and opened my car door for me. What a hunk! I was surprised and absolutely loved it. He had already outdone all of those guys in the past and the rest of the day was all I ever dreamed of. We joined two other couples for dinner at Olive Garden (yum!) and watched Hitch back at Ryan's apartment with rose petals and candles surrounding us. Super romantic and cute, don't you think?
The weekend after Valentine's Day, Ryan was going to Arizona with a group of girls to his friend's mission farewell. It was going to be the first time we would be away from each other for a couple of days and I wasn't super excited. I wasn't worried about Ryan cheating on me or anything like that. That thought never crossed my mind. What I was worried about was that Ryan would be around all these girls and be reminded of what it was like to be single and want to live that lifestyle again. I didn't want to think about it, but it lingered in the back of my mind while he was gone.
The morning after he got back, I drove over to his apartment to see him. I couldn't contain my excitement! As soon as I walked through the door, we hugged for a really long time and just sat on his bed and talked. He told me all about his trip and how much fun he had. My worries started to rise a little bit about the whole single thing and then, he said, "I really missed you like really really missed you. I had fun and all, but I couldn't stop thinking about you the whole time. After being with all of those girls, it made me realize how lucky I am to have you in my life. You are so amazing and understanding. You are everything that I've always wanted. I love everything about you. I love you." There it was. The "L" word. Words cannot describe how happy I was in that moment. Everything felt so right and perfect. Nothing could bring us down and never will be able to.
After that day, our relationship grew to a whole other height. Ryan's awkwardness was completely gone and those quick, nervous pecks turned into real, normal kisses. Holding hands wasn't a big deal and for the first time, I felt like his girlfriend. We never ever fought or had an argument which I loved and everything was so smooth. It's still hard to believe how perfect everything still is. I never thought happily ever afters existed until I met Ryan.
Ryan and I were engaged two months later on April 24th, 2013. He let me pick out my ring a week or two before which I absolutely loved! It's exactly what I wanted: rose gold. On the morning of the 24th, I got off work at 6:30 a.m. and drove over to Ryan's apartment. On the days I had school, he would always make me a bed in his living room so that I could take a little nap before classes. He lived right next to the college so it made it really nice for me and my sleep. Anyway, I pulled into the parking lot and opened the front door. There was Ryan all dressed up in the same suit from Valentine's day with his hair all fixed up, kneeling in the middle of a petal of flowers in the shape of a heart. Little candles were lit up all over the room along with rose petals scattered across the floor. His best friend, Gary, sat at the table taking pictures and recording the whole thing. Ryan said some sweet things, popped the question, and of course, I said yes.
I had almost gotten married before Ryan and I am SO glad that I didn't. Before, I was scared and had nightmares about getting married, but when it came to marrying Ryan, I was ecstatic. I couldn't wait and that's how it should have been.
I'm a firm believer that everything happens for a reason. Ryan and I only dated four months and were married three months later. A lot of people may think we're crazy, but when you know something is right, you go for it and that's exactly what we did. Marrying Ryan was and still is the best decision I have ever made. He is my better half and I can't imagine my life without him. We've almost been married a year and it's been the happiest year of my entire life.